I Don't Remember the Last Time I Felt Pretty

It was Sunday afternoon.  Ryan was running errands and Josie was sleeping.  I had a list of things to do, but the only thing I could think of when I looked in the mirror was that I couldn’t remember the last time I felt pretty.  And I didn’t like it.  It’s not actually about looking pretty, but feeling pretty.  Girls, you know what I’m talking about right?  But what’s the first thing you think you need to do when you don’t feel pretty?  Get to work on the outside. 

the last time i felt pretty.png

So I did: 

  • Hot shower   
  • Curled hair
  • 20-minute mascara application
  • Cute clothes
  • Painted nails

All great things that made me feel better about my outside appearance, but nothing that stuck longer than that evening.  And as I dug deeper into this, I realized that it all comes back to my New Year’s Resolution – to put more focus on self-care

What does feeling pretty really have to do with self-care?  EVERYTHING!!!!!!  Everything.  

Case in point, the week after my not-pretty afternoon, I went on a Girls’ Weekend with my college roommates.  On the first day, my soul was so filled with peace and encouragement, just from being together and laughing and swapping stories about babies with the flu and potty training and our husbands who sacrifice so we can jet out for a weekend away.  

not pretty 1.jpg

So filled that I lay on the side of a mountain, covered in snow, and felt like taking a selfie -- which had little to do with my physical appearance and everything to do with how pretty I felt surrounded by my beautiful friends and the beautiful mountain.  And I knew I would post it because in the moments after the selfie when I lay there in the snow, I actually cried from relief that these moments exist.  If we focus on filling our own cups, we are able to pour into others - love and joy and peace and encouragement.  We can be who our family needs, and who our friends need, and who the world needs -- our best selves!  Exactly who we are!  Exactly who we were created to be! 

But it doesn't just happen.  We need to figure out what brings us the most joy and create the space for it.  Not every weekend or even every year will we have the time or money to spend a weekend away with besties eating fancy crepes and getting massages and pedicures.  But every day we can do one thing that fills our cup a little more.  And with that we can love extravagantly!  God can take our little efforts of self-care and multiply them into care for those around us.  He is extra gracious and generous in that way.  

You can't pour from an empty cup.  And you can't feel pretty with an empty cup either.  

Friends, please.  Create small moments in your day that fill you and cling to them!  You are worth the effort.

*Editor’s note. I first published this post in January of 2016 but needed to send this out again - to myself, to my college roommates who are headed into town in a few days for a kid-free weekend at my house for what is becoming an annual self-care girls’ weekend, and for you, friend, who may not feel pretty or remember the last time you did. You are.

If you need a little boost, join other rock star moms in our Mother of the Year Facebook group. You'll post. You'll laugh. You'll cry. But most of all, you'll be encouraged!

Lisa GraftComment