Posts tagged discipline
22 Things You Never Thought You'd Say as a Mom (and 6 extras for all the #boymoms!)

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh motherhood. No one can prepare you for all of the wonderful joys and surprises. And by surprises, I mean, hugging your crying, naked toddler on the toilet while she experiences -- let’s call it, gastrointestinal distress -- for the first time.

In our I Am Mother of the Year Facebook group, one mama recently started a little game called “Things You Thought You’d Never Say as a Parent…” and started us off with a doozy (see #1 below):

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We’re probably not ready for this, but let the games begin!

1.  Bethany: “Please go refill the dog’s water dish because your sister just picked it up and drank the last of it!”

2.  Trish: “Stop pooping on people. It’s rude!”

3.  Jessica: “Don’t measure your baby brother’s face with your pancake!”

4.  Sarah: “Please don’t lick the trash can!”

5.  Megan: “No, you can’t have my phone to take a picture of me going potty!”

6.  Gina: “You are not a beaver. Quit chewing the furniture!”

7.  Emily: “You can pick your nose, just don’t eat it!”

8.  Kyle: “Please don’t lick the bottom of your shoes!”

9.  Jacki: “Why is your toothbrush in the toilet AGAIN!?”

10.  Amy: “Please stop licking the toilet bowl.”

11.  Katie: “Stop putting your bologna on my knee.”

12.  Leigh Ann: “Please don’t put crackers in your butt.”

13.  Andi: “Stop putting your feet in your brother’s mouth.”

14.  Amy: “Stop licking your armpit to see if it’s clean.”

15.  Andrea: “Poop isn’t finger paint.”

16.  Amber: “Why is the bread in the dryer?”

17.  Bean: “Please stop picking up your laundry with a machete.”

18.  Erika: “Put the dog poop down!”

19.  Jacque: “We don’t hammer people.”

20.  Dusanka: “Stop licking my nose.”

21.  Heather: “Stop licking the dog.”

22. Jacki: “If you lick your brother’s hair again you are going in the corner.”

And then there’s all the boy mom ones that have me ALL THE WAY WORRIED about Cal (16 months old) growing up! Ha! I don’t think I’m ready to add the word “penis” into our regular conversations!

Boy moms say WHAT?!:

1.  Diedra: “Don’t put your penis on that!”

2.  Christy (to her triplet boys): “Just because I bought you a cup does not mean that you can hit each other in the nuts.”

3.  Emily: “Your penis is not a gun. Please stop trying to shoot your brother with it.”

4.  Naomi: “Please stop playing peek-a-boo with your penis at the breakfast table.”

5.  Katie: “Why are you praying to your penis?”

6.  Jacque: “Don’t tickle your penis with the wall.”

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So there ya have it. All the things we never thought we’d say as parents (or even as humans) that we are so used to just flowing out of our mouths. And because I feel like I can’t write a blog without some kind of takeaway, here it is:

  • We’re all nuts. Seriously. Every one of us has some kind of chaos going on.

  • You are not alone. Whether what comes out of your mouth is funny, ridiculous, horrifying or downright depressing, I guarantee you are not the only one feeling the way that you’re feeling.

  • Mama, you are a rock star. You are doing a great job. So in case no one else tells you today, you heard it here: You are a really good mom.

So what about you? What crazy things have you said to your kids lately?

P.S. Today’s short post brought to you by the fact that I’m working hard on writing and finalizing one of the talks that I’ll start giving to MOPS/Mom’s groups in the coming weeks. If you’re in need of a speaker for an event, pick me! Pick me! I’ve got references!

How To Punch Fear in the Face

“I just want to have a good night.”

That’s what I think EVERY. SINGLE. AFTERNOON. on my way to pick up the kids from daycare. That’s not too much to ask, right?! A few hours of family bliss. Hugs and snuggles. Sure, the occasional time-out when necessary, but let’s just all get along.

Well, that wasn’t tonight. I knew we were off to a bad start when Josie wouldn’t let me look at her when I picked her up from daycare. Yes, you read that right. She wouldn’t even allow me to watch her get into her car seat and buckle up. And, of course, as the parent, I don’t follow her rules because she doesn’t get to make the rules.

Disaster ensued.

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But I was able to channel something that felt a lot like confidence. I was peaceful, even as she was losing her mind. And I think I know where that came from.

Last night, I stood in front of a hundred people – spotlight shining, mic booming, and cameras rolling – to share my story of creating this whole Mother of the Year movement. I was scared to death. (So nervous, in fact, that the day before, I was so full of self-doubt about speaking that I had myself convinced I was so inadequate that I couldn’t even buy a shirt at the mall. It’s quite the leap, but I’m sure you’ve been there with something equally as ridiculous!) But once I hit that stage, that sweet peaceful confidence took over. I stepped right through that fear to tell the crowd the same truth that I try to tell myself every day.

I told every single person there that their best is enough for their families. That they didn’t have to love every minute of motherhood to love their kids well. That they are great mothers (or fathers, grandparents, sisters, etc.).

Tonight, I believed that for myself.

And that’s what made a difference in my parenting. Maybe I was still riding that high, but I figured if I could push through fear last night and experience something life-giving and amazing in front of a crowd, then I could push through the fear of not having a good night with my kids to be the confident, tough, loving mother that my firecracker daughter needed tonight.

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Some takeaways:

  • It’s not about perfection. I flubbed and ad-libbed a few times in my 10-minutes on stage last night. And I waffled a bit tonight, too. Perfection is not what ushers in the peace.

  • Replace the lies with the truth. The gremlins in our heads will give a pretty powerful performance, convincing us that the mean and horrible things only we would think of ourselves are actually true. They aren’t. And the sooner we can spot the lies and replace them with the truth, the more peaceful we will be.

  • Get to know yourself. Seriously, as soon as I started on my journey of discovering and naming the unique parts of my personality, my passions, my drive, I truly believe God kept calling me step by step into my future. I started a blog, got back on the radio, and launched the Mother of the Year movement. But more than those “accomplishments”, I was able to see that how God put me together wasn’t an accident. That my empathy is more blessing than curse. That my gift of storytelling has actually been one of my strengths my entire life. And the list goes on. THE BEST PART: the more I know about myself, the better mother I am! (If this sounds interesting to you, and you want to know more about starting this journey, I’d love to invite you to an event that could seriously change your life!)

The best things in life are waiting for us on the other side of fear. For me, I may always be scared that I’m going to ruin my kids one way or the other, but I hope I keep walking through that fear to parent from a place of peace. And I will probably always be shaking in my boots before I speak in front of a crowd, but you better believe I’m going to find a way back to that spotlight and shout it from the roof tops that You Are MOTHER OF THE YEAR!

And you want to talk about peace? How about putting your 4-year-old to bed at 6:15 p.m. I mean, that’s real peace right there! 

So what’s it for you? Is fear or peace shaping your motherhood?

P.S. I’m working on some AMAZING resources for you to help us sort through all of this! Join my email list, and you’ll be the first to know!