Wave BYE BYE to Fear in the New Year!

I don’t want 2019 to go the way it started. Lord have mercy, I was a willing participant in the battle royale against fear.

You wouldn’t believe the lies I was telling myself almost as soon as my feet hit the carpet.

Ryan and I are running the Indy Mini Marathon in May. LIE: I need to lace up my shoes and run all 13.1 miles today to make sure I can still do it after two babies. (How about putting together a doable training plan and trusting the process?)

I’m going to treat my body better in January with a little thing called fruits and vegetables. LIE: Because I haven’t stocked the fridge with a rainbow of fruits and veggies, I’m destined to exist off of sugar all year. (How about waiting until the grocery stores are actually open to buy a reasonable amount of healthy food that won’t go bad in the fridge waiting for its consumption?)

Our house needs a good purge. LIE: I need to run around like a crazy person throwing junk into bins and lighting them all on fire. (How about one room at a time there, mama?)

I’ve got a million ideas to impact more lives through I Am Mother of the Year. LIE: I need to hide away in a quiet place for a week to put all of these items into action or I’m never going to do it. (How about making a list and taking one day at a time, and maybe scheduling a few 4-hour blocks of time into the month of January to focus?)

LIE: I’m already a failure in 2019. I would rather skip 2019 altogether so I don’t suffer the impending humiliation of not meeting any of my goals.

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The truth is:

  • Resolutions are not won or lost in a single moment, or even in a day. Resolutions, like all important things in our lives, are a continuous battle worth fighting for.

  • Fear is my enemy, and I will treat it as such. I will combat the lies fear whispers in my ear with the truth.

  • The journey is usually more important than the destination. Maybe defeating fear isn’t the main goal – but allowing myself to be refined by the process itself.

  • It’s not about perfection. Good thing, too, because I’m so far from it in every area of life.

And the greater truth is this. 2019 is going to be one of the most exhilarating years of my life. God is equipping me for what He is calling me in to. And what he is calling me in to is a movement that brings encouragement, hope, and peace to moms in the trenches. Moms like me. He is calling me into a more disciplined structure of self-care. A more intentional, firm parenting style. An adventurous marriage.

Sounds like a lot. And definitely a lot to be afraid of if I am constantly afraid of failure. But as my one and only resolution, I commit to loving myself the way God loves me. The best that I can each moment. And I’ll give that love away to everyone I’m lucky enough to come in contact with.

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So on this third day of January, 2019, focus on seeking grace. Glimpsing hope. Counting the small victories (like a quiet house and some hot tea). Choosing to not stay stuck in the fear, even if you’re not exactly sure the way out of it.

Maybe you’re like me, and you’re overwhelmed with the possibilities of the new year. Or maybe you’re on the confident train, chugging your way to the best version of yourself. Wherever you are, maybe we could go through this year together? Encouraging each other on the days we feel like failures? Asking each other for help when we can’t find the truth? Supporting each other through every peak and every valley and not comparing our journeys? Celebrating every small moment because we know that’s what our lives are actually made of?

If you can’t tell, I’m going to need ya!

So, here’s to leaning in to 2019 with gentle confidence, compassionate curiosity, and grace upon grace upon grace for ourselves and each other.

Lisa GraftComment